Save Me, Jeebus
Dr. Ding went to check her Yahoo! email just now, only to be greeted with the following headline:
“Holmes’ short hair makes bold statement”
Now, admittedly most of this is my own fault. I set my Yahoo email to stun “Entertainment” the other day, from “Top Stories,” and this, I suppose, is the price I am paying.
Dr. Ding believes in the diligent practice of a media diet, that is, the conscious delimiting of how much negative, crappy, and/or otherwise generally unpleasant news is ingested on a daily basis. While I believe it’s important to maintain an awareness of what’s happening in the world, I believe it’s fairly pointless and even at times unnecessarily psychologically distressing to subsist on a steady intake of horror, atrocity, and inhumanity. So, I’ll usually watch only part of the nightly news, and mostly just scan newspaper and internet headlines pertaining to all the shititudinous stuff going on outside the confines of my spectacularly-shaped cranium.
When the world is too much with me, I check out the fluffy stuff as a distraction and a way of maintaining equilibrium.
But hair? Bold?
Statement?
The ensuing Yahoo article blathered on about various important tonsorial trends and how different people look when they have (gasp!) bangs versus no bangs.
In 2005 Dr. Ding donated 10″ of her luxuriously silky mane to Locks of Love, a charity that provides natural hair prosthetics to disadvantaged kids with long-term medical hair loss. I couldn’t stop, and it eventually morphed into a Holmesianesque short haircut. And then I had it dyed it bright, Ronald McDonald red.
Now that’s a bold statement, muthafuckas. How bold, you ask?
Really fuckin’ bold. And my statement?
My statement was this: I got a fuckin’ haircut and dyed my fuckin’ hair Ronald McDonald red.
What I don’t understand is: why didn’t someone alert the media?
| Etsy: QueenBodacious |
HALLELUJAH!
People are often flabbergasted that I don’t generally don’t have explicit details on what is happening around me. I do read headlines, but I can’t tell you the latest dead count in Iraq or if there were shootings in manhattan last night. Heck I didn’t even know about the impending blizzard last night that ended up being…um…. like a rain ice storm with no accumulation. My general feeling is there is a roof over my head, food on my plate and shoes on my feet. I don’t need to feel bad about the rest of the world when I can offer a bagel to the homeless man in front of my building.
j