Dr. Ding And The Case Of The $2500 Wedding Dress
Well fuck me to tears, me fuckos.
Being ridiculously in love with as well as engaged to The Beyonce, Dr. Ding has dutifully been looking at pictures of wedding dresses, as I’ve heard the showing up to one’s wedding wearing an enormously unflattering and uninteresting dress instead of a simple magenta Flamenco costume is all the rage in modern times. Strange, but true.
Imagine my horror at finding out that most wedding dresses nowadays cost between $1200 and $2500. PLUS the cost of alterations, veil, and various hellish undergarments, which add perhaps another grand on top of that initial outlay. The horror! Oh, the humanity.
The groom rents a tux and even the shoes if need be. Total cost, including aftershave: around $150.
I think this discrimination against men needs to stop. I mean, doesn’t this financial equation mean that we’re saying that men are 10 times less important and valuable? After all, we only expect them to plunk down their monthly beer budget when they get married, whereas the bride is expected to shell out the cost of 250 finely-crafted Belvedere martinis, slightly dirty, plus tip.
Good citizens of Bloggyland, lend me your ears. Do not rest until this imbalance, this horrid form of discrimination against bridgegrooms has been redressed. We will storm the beaches of Al’s Formalwear and add zeros to the price tags therein. We will raise the flag of freedom as we righteously raise floor markups at Mr. Angelo’s Tuxedo Palace and possibly some eyebrows. Never shall we fail in our most noble quest. Victory! Once more into the breach!
Who’s with me?
| Etsy: QueenBodacious |
The good Dr. Ding is engaged! I probably had missed that before, but best wishes! There is a definite discrimination going on with the wedding garb, but when it comes down to it, when was the last time you heard someone talk about a wedding say “And you should have seen the groom, he was just breathtaking in that Mr. Tux special!”? (Though, I live in Massachusetts, so there are probably a greater percentage of groom-groom weddings in this neck of the woods than in the Lone Star State. Though, now that I think of it, they probably aren’t picking out their tuxes at the local strip mall rent-a-tux…)
Yes, but don’t forget about the ring. If you factor in the ring, we actually come out ahead in this deal. The groom has to buy the bride’s engagement ring & her wedding ring. That’s a good 2 month’s salary if you listen to the diamond shop lame-o’s. If men had to spring for a fancy, frilly suit, too, we’d never get them down the aisle!
Kelly-
Your logic is inescapable. Dang.
But onward I shall fight!
I vote for the flamenco dress. You can rent one locally for like 35 bucks. ; )