Ask Dr. Ding

You may be surprised to learn that Dr. Ding has an actual mother and did not daintily spring, wholly formed, from the head of some demon goddess. But, yes, it’s true. Not only does Dr. Ding have a mother, but she has an Irish Catholic Mother.

For those of you who aren’t in the know, most Irish Americans aren’t exactly renowned for their vast skills with the culinary arts. Many in my family can barely open a package of frozen fish sticks without some series of issues cropping up, such as: Do I own a pan? And if so, where is it located? Ah yes, the kitchen. Hmm. Says here to thaw the sticks first, but I’m thinking that’s probably just for the Prods who can’t be bothered to eat fish on Friday. I’d better call Maureen and ask her about this thawing business. Strikes me as totally unnecessary.

Okay, so maybe we aren’t that inept or anachronistic. Maybe it’s just Dr. Ding’s excuse for serving The Beyonce beef hotdogs atop low-carb pasta while passing it off as as Celtic Ratatouille. Maybe.

Regardless, Dr. Ding’s Momma used to make these cookies around the holidays, and let me just say, they’re fantasgreat. They taste like you spent all day baking, or at least flinging bits of flour into the air so that it lands on your face, making it look like you’ve been very assiduously toiling away all day in the kitchen. Not that I’ve ever done that.

MOMMA’S LEMON CAKE MIX COOKIES
INGREDIENTS:

* 1 box lemon cake mix (the non-pudding kind)
* 1 egg, beaten
* 8 ounce container whipped topping (Cool Whip*)
* 1 Tbs. lemon juice
* Powdered sugar

PREPARATION:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease cookie sheet. Gently mix. Drop by teaspoon in powder sugar and roll into ball. Bake for about 10 minutes. Do not overbake. Cool and store in tightly covered tin or plastic container. Makes a chewy cookie.

Since many cookies must be tested immediately following the baking, it is impossible to say with any accuracy how many cookies this recipe makes.

*Warning: Dr. Ding is morally opposed to Cool Whip, as it contains lots of hydrogenated oils which are notoriously bad for you, but if you’re going to eat them anyway, make these cookies. A couple won’t hurt. Probably. Or, they might give you some absurd form of presenile dementia that will slowly rot your brain from the inside out as you inexplicably pull your pants up to your armpits.